You've been diagnosed with an incurable illness that generally progresses with time - what will your future hold, and will you ever be happy again? The news is devastating, but please be assured that you are still in control of your life, and happiness can be yours if you choose it.
Seventeen years ago, I was diagnosed with an incurable illness - multiple sclerosis (MS). I've had many attacks on my body and am at a place now where walking unassisted is not really possible; and just when it seemed things couldn't get any worse, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. I have learned a lot about myself, about life, and about others along the way, and I want to share with you how I remain happy despite these adversities.
First, I found out everything I possibly could about these illnesses. Know your enemy. When I first thought of MS, I envisioned canes, walkers and wheelchairs. What we imagine can be much worse than the real thing. Through my research I learned that there are different kinds of MS, and it can be controlled somewhat with diet, exercise and attitude. Working at keeping yourself as healthy as possible will give you a sense of power and control over the illness.
Surround yourself with positive, happy people. I read countless books that gave me hope like "Think and Grow Rich" by Napoleon Hill, "Ask and it is Given" by Esther Hicks, and watched television shows that guaranteed a good laugh like Seinfeld. As they say, laughter is the best medicine.
Exercise. Your body needs to move, no matter how far along the illness is, and exercise will not only greatly improve your body, but also your mood.
Help others, it will make a world of difference to both you and them. Firstly, it will help you to focus your energy away from the illness and any negativity that may come with it. Secondly, it helps you to realize that others have it hard too and need your help. The golden rule says that there is more happiness in giving than there is in receiving, so thirdly, you will feel so good and happy to know that you have the power and ability to make a difference in the lives of others in need. And finally, those you are helping will be encouraged by your self-sacrificing and will be motivated to help others too. What you give out to others, tends to return to you tenfold.
Looking forward to something in the near future will also help to keep you happy. Whether it's a vacation away, a movie out with a loved one, or a dinner with friends and family, having something to look forward to will keep your spirits up.
Believe that you will get well - whether from science or from a higher power. There are countless doctors and researchers working on a cure, and things can change overnight. Believe that it will. This faith and hope has made a huge difference to me, and is what keeps me going - the belief that whatever happens, I will bounce back. There is stem cell research that can regenerate mobility that has been lost. I even heard the other day that researchers are not too far away from doing a full head transplant onto a donor body. Crazy I know, but this could be the answer for someone completely incapacitated.
Take the time to focus on all the good in your life and write down all that you have for which to be grateful. You will soon realize that there are many great things to dwell on other than the illness.
Whenever I walk down the road with my cane and a big smile on my face, it always seems to surprise people. It's like they expect me to be sad, but when I smile it serves as an inspiration to them, and I can't tell you how many times they have said this to me. You can be an inspiration to others too. As the good book says, "when I am weak, then I am powerful". If you don't feel like smiling, try to fake it until you make it. You'll be surprised how quickly it will come naturally for you and in turn, bring you joy.
There is no explanation as to why this illness has manifested itself, but you have the power to not let it consume you while maintaining a happy life. Nobody on this earth knows what good or bad is around the corner. All we can do is live our lives in a way that will bring us, and those around us, the greatest happiness.
Monday, July 8, 2013
Wednesday, June 19, 2013
One woman's journey to expand her family
In 2009, at the age of 40 and many unsuccessful attempts to get pregnant naturally, I went through fertility testing. The results of the tests, received September 2, 2009, indicated that I had a follicle stimulating hormone (FSH) level of 20 and 2 follicles in my ovaries. At the time, these results meant nothing to me however I now understand what a low probability I had of getting pregnant. I learned that an FSH level of 20 is quite high while 2 follicles is extremely low. My understanding is the lesser the follicles, the higher the FSH level as your body increases this level to try to stimulate follicle growth in your ovaries (the reason for which it's called the Follicle Stimulating Hormone).
The doctor explained that my only option was in vitro fertilization (IVF) at which point I asked for a detailed description of the process. As she started to inform me that the process began on the 3rd of the menstrual cycle I stopped listening. I was in the midst of my cycle that day and my first day was on August 31 so I began counting. August 31 - day 1, September 1 - day 2, September 2 - DAY 3! Oh my gosh! It was day 3! I asked whether I could start the process immediately since it was day 3 of my cycle. She walked away to discuss this with the Director of the facility, returned and informed me that I was able to start but would have to wait a long while before seeing the next doctor. That day, I began the IVF journey to become a mom. I spent the next 7 days injecting hormones in the morning and evening, going to the clinic every second morning for ultrasounds and blood tests to monitor my follicle growth and hormone levels. The good news was that my ovaries produced 4 - 5 follicles, a very exciting outlook having begun with an indication of 2.
On the 9th day, a procedure to collect the eggs was performed which resulted in 3 eggs, even more exciting! I spent the entire day, evening and night focused on fertilization. I envisioned, reiterated the word and constantly thought "fertilize." In my mind's eye, I could see the two cells in an egg and that's all I could think about. The laboratory called us the following day and informed us that one of the three eggs fertilized. Although my immediate reaction was a disappointing "oh, only one" my next thought was "this is the one! This is my little survivor!" I had an exceedingly positive feeling that this was the one! This was my baby and all would be fine.
The next day, Sunday September 13, 2009 (a day I will not forget) my husband and I went to the clinic to have the embryo transferred into my uterus. Before the embryo is placed into the uterus, it is put on a television screen for us to see, live and real time! I wasn't aware that we would see the embryo, live, so remember feeling happily surprised that I had such a wonderful opportunity to see my future child as a four-celled embryo. Suddenly I realized that this process was a gift. Had I gotten pregnant naturally, I would have missed this, what I feel is a grand opportunity. I was afforded the chance to see my future child start life before it evolved into human form, before it had a heart, before it had veins, eyes, a head. I saw it at the very beginning stages when it was simply four cells wrapped in a protective shield (called the zona) providing it with a safe place to continue its cell multiplication in the process of becoming my baby. They transferred it from the petri dish to a catheter and into my uterus in a very specific location giving it the utmost chance of survival. I was told to lie there for 15 minutes just to give the little embryo a chance to settle in, although it will float around the uterus for approximately 4 days. This was a tremendously exciting feeling and I said, Welcome Home while putting my hands on my lower abdomen.
Then came the two week waiting period which can be excruciating. The waiting period is filled with physiological and psychological changes. I was continuing to inject hormones, progesterone, on a daily basis as part of the continued protocol to increase my chances of getting pregnant. These hormones can give the person the same symptoms as being pregnant which certainly doesn't make it easy during this waiting period. My senses were on hyper-alert, paying attention to every little feeling I had. On one hand I was trying to maintain a calm, even keel and be realistic to the possibility that this might not succeed. On the other hand, staying positive, envisioning being pregnant, giving birth and holding my baby for the first time was also floating through my mind's eye. The challenging part of this two week wait is trying to stay balanced between the two thoughts. I didn't want to be overly positive resulting in a potential crash with disappointment if it failed however I didn't want to exude negative energy potentially sabotaging the success of the embryo implanting. This was the biggest struggle throughout this period of time all the while, your body is feeling every little sensation, every cramp, headache, pain, soreness and/or bloating. Ughhh!
Then comes the time to visit the clinic for the HCG blood test - the test you hope will be positive and indicate that you're pregnant. At the beginning of this process I had envisioned texting my husband "We did it! It worked! I'm Pregnant!" Now I sat in the waiting room waiting to be called in for the blood test. My heart was beating directly into my ears. I had had no bleeding, I had cramps, my boobs were sore and I had headaches. Could I be pregnant? Was this simply a result of the progesterone injections? Am I? Am I not? Try not to think about it because after the blood test comes the call.....
The doctor explained that my only option was in vitro fertilization (IVF) at which point I asked for a detailed description of the process. As she started to inform me that the process began on the 3rd of the menstrual cycle I stopped listening. I was in the midst of my cycle that day and my first day was on August 31 so I began counting. August 31 - day 1, September 1 - day 2, September 2 - DAY 3! Oh my gosh! It was day 3! I asked whether I could start the process immediately since it was day 3 of my cycle. She walked away to discuss this with the Director of the facility, returned and informed me that I was able to start but would have to wait a long while before seeing the next doctor. That day, I began the IVF journey to become a mom. I spent the next 7 days injecting hormones in the morning and evening, going to the clinic every second morning for ultrasounds and blood tests to monitor my follicle growth and hormone levels. The good news was that my ovaries produced 4 - 5 follicles, a very exciting outlook having begun with an indication of 2.
On the 9th day, a procedure to collect the eggs was performed which resulted in 3 eggs, even more exciting! I spent the entire day, evening and night focused on fertilization. I envisioned, reiterated the word and constantly thought "fertilize." In my mind's eye, I could see the two cells in an egg and that's all I could think about. The laboratory called us the following day and informed us that one of the three eggs fertilized. Although my immediate reaction was a disappointing "oh, only one" my next thought was "this is the one! This is my little survivor!" I had an exceedingly positive feeling that this was the one! This was my baby and all would be fine.
The next day, Sunday September 13, 2009 (a day I will not forget) my husband and I went to the clinic to have the embryo transferred into my uterus. Before the embryo is placed into the uterus, it is put on a television screen for us to see, live and real time! I wasn't aware that we would see the embryo, live, so remember feeling happily surprised that I had such a wonderful opportunity to see my future child as a four-celled embryo. Suddenly I realized that this process was a gift. Had I gotten pregnant naturally, I would have missed this, what I feel is a grand opportunity. I was afforded the chance to see my future child start life before it evolved into human form, before it had a heart, before it had veins, eyes, a head. I saw it at the very beginning stages when it was simply four cells wrapped in a protective shield (called the zona) providing it with a safe place to continue its cell multiplication in the process of becoming my baby. They transferred it from the petri dish to a catheter and into my uterus in a very specific location giving it the utmost chance of survival. I was told to lie there for 15 minutes just to give the little embryo a chance to settle in, although it will float around the uterus for approximately 4 days. This was a tremendously exciting feeling and I said, Welcome Home while putting my hands on my lower abdomen.
Then came the two week waiting period which can be excruciating. The waiting period is filled with physiological and psychological changes. I was continuing to inject hormones, progesterone, on a daily basis as part of the continued protocol to increase my chances of getting pregnant. These hormones can give the person the same symptoms as being pregnant which certainly doesn't make it easy during this waiting period. My senses were on hyper-alert, paying attention to every little feeling I had. On one hand I was trying to maintain a calm, even keel and be realistic to the possibility that this might not succeed. On the other hand, staying positive, envisioning being pregnant, giving birth and holding my baby for the first time was also floating through my mind's eye. The challenging part of this two week wait is trying to stay balanced between the two thoughts. I didn't want to be overly positive resulting in a potential crash with disappointment if it failed however I didn't want to exude negative energy potentially sabotaging the success of the embryo implanting. This was the biggest struggle throughout this period of time all the while, your body is feeling every little sensation, every cramp, headache, pain, soreness and/or bloating. Ughhh!
Then comes the time to visit the clinic for the HCG blood test - the test you hope will be positive and indicate that you're pregnant. At the beginning of this process I had envisioned texting my husband "We did it! It worked! I'm Pregnant!" Now I sat in the waiting room waiting to be called in for the blood test. My heart was beating directly into my ears. I had had no bleeding, I had cramps, my boobs were sore and I had headaches. Could I be pregnant? Was this simply a result of the progesterone injections? Am I? Am I not? Try not to think about it because after the blood test comes the call.....
Sunday, June 9, 2013
What it's like to have an illness that you can hide from no one...
Imagine someone asked you to walk through a huge room of people - some of them friends, most of them strangers. This would be no typical walk about. Before you could begin your trek, you would have to sit cross legged on the floor until both legs were numb. You would have to wear 20-30 pound weights on each leg - that nobody would be able to see. And finally, you would be spun around until you were dizzy enough to nearly fall down. Nobody else in the room would be aware of the pre-requisites to this walk.
As you enter the room, you would use all your energy trying not to make a scene, yet despite your best efforts, you would be noticed. Many would look at you puzzled, unsure what to make of you. Some would offer you a helping hand. Others would wonder if you were drunk and look away with a laugh or in partial disgust. Within minutes you would feel exhausted beyond belief, and would be forced to sit down to regain your strength. While seated you would feel fine and would appear to be normal once again to all, but you would eventually need to get up, and the cycle would begin all over again.
The above situation would be more bearable IF it was a one time occurrence, but unfortunately it's not. You will now wake up every day with numb legs and feet. It will seem like 25 pounds have been added to each leg, and you will have a loss of balance that will make you feel as if you could fall at any given moment. You will have test after test after MRI and eventually be told that you have an incurable disease that generally progresses with time. You will have multiple sclerosis (MS).
So how in the world do you deal with this? I can tell you from personal experience, having had this illness for 17 years, that it's not easy. One of the most important things I've learned in life is that EVERYONE has something in their life to deal with that is just as debilitating to them as the MS is to me. I always remember this whenever I feel like throwing a pity party. So many people today are suffering in silence since their problem is not obvious to all the way mine is. True, mine is a biggie, but I can honestly say that I would not be the person I am today without it.
I have learned what an absolutely amazing husband I have who is always there for me, as frustrating as I'm sure it is for him. Due to this illness, I met some absolutely fantastic people who have become as close to me as sisters. They suffer from the same illness as me, and share the same beliefs as well - that we would rather spend our time finding ways to make the best of our situation, staying as healthy and as fit as possible, helping each other through our highs and lows. The wonderful friends I have who don't share this illness definitely understand and help me in ways too numerable to mention here. And last but certainly not least, I have my family who taught me to be positive no matter what life throws at you.
We are who we are due to our life experiences and how we choose to handle them. No one said life would be easy or fair, but we can make it the best life possible if we choose to make it that way. In my next blog, I'll discuss specific ways I use to stay positive.
As you enter the room, you would use all your energy trying not to make a scene, yet despite your best efforts, you would be noticed. Many would look at you puzzled, unsure what to make of you. Some would offer you a helping hand. Others would wonder if you were drunk and look away with a laugh or in partial disgust. Within minutes you would feel exhausted beyond belief, and would be forced to sit down to regain your strength. While seated you would feel fine and would appear to be normal once again to all, but you would eventually need to get up, and the cycle would begin all over again.
The above situation would be more bearable IF it was a one time occurrence, but unfortunately it's not. You will now wake up every day with numb legs and feet. It will seem like 25 pounds have been added to each leg, and you will have a loss of balance that will make you feel as if you could fall at any given moment. You will have test after test after MRI and eventually be told that you have an incurable disease that generally progresses with time. You will have multiple sclerosis (MS).
So how in the world do you deal with this? I can tell you from personal experience, having had this illness for 17 years, that it's not easy. One of the most important things I've learned in life is that EVERYONE has something in their life to deal with that is just as debilitating to them as the MS is to me. I always remember this whenever I feel like throwing a pity party. So many people today are suffering in silence since their problem is not obvious to all the way mine is. True, mine is a biggie, but I can honestly say that I would not be the person I am today without it.
I have learned what an absolutely amazing husband I have who is always there for me, as frustrating as I'm sure it is for him. Due to this illness, I met some absolutely fantastic people who have become as close to me as sisters. They suffer from the same illness as me, and share the same beliefs as well - that we would rather spend our time finding ways to make the best of our situation, staying as healthy and as fit as possible, helping each other through our highs and lows. The wonderful friends I have who don't share this illness definitely understand and help me in ways too numerable to mention here. And last but certainly not least, I have my family who taught me to be positive no matter what life throws at you.
We are who we are due to our life experiences and how we choose to handle them. No one said life would be easy or fair, but we can make it the best life possible if we choose to make it that way. In my next blog, I'll discuss specific ways I use to stay positive.
Wednesday, June 5, 2013
The law of attraction is physics continued...
As I mentioned in my previous post, many people had been trying to set me up with Barry who had voiced his disinterest in the past. I forgot to mention that Barry is a doctor which will only be important in the sense that everyone wanting to set me up kept mentioning this. I continued to disregard their requests until the 8th and last one occurred because of its oddity.
Before the oddity - on August 23, 2008 I remember feeling incredibly grateful as I was writing in my journal but had connected my passion for finding the man I wanted with what I was describing over time. I remember writing the following in my journal with a huge smile on my face, sparkle in my eye and passion in my veins (for the first time)
"I want to meet a man who is kind, sweet, loving, caring, passionate, concerned, sensitive to my needs, worldy, intelligent, financially stable, tall, dark hair, physically fit or partially active, humble, enjoys staying home more than going out, runs or jogs, is honest, learns from mistakes, understanding, wise, spiritual, warm, affectionate, loves me for who I am."
Yes I know this is quite a big list, but at the same time it was an honest one, where I was able to identify traits on which I wouldn't compromise and ones where I would. The person with whom I wanted to share my life HAD to be kind, sweet, loving, caring, passionate, concerned (which meant compassionate), sensitive to my needs, intelligent, financially stable, somewhat active, humble, honest, learns from mistakes, understanding, wise, spiritual, warm, affectionate and loves me for who I am. The traits on which I would compromise were tall, dark hair, enjoys staying at home more than going out, runs or jogs.
Now back to my 8th set up:
In the beginning of September my friend went out to a restaurant to celebrate a birthday with a close friend. When they were being seated by the hostess they happened to start a conversation about whether she was single. She informed them that she had recently been set up with someone whom she was dating but continued to say she was to be originally set up with another man. She heard so many good things about this man, a doctor, that she asked my friend if he knew a nice single with whom she can fix him up. My friend immediately called me from the restaurant and said, do you want to be fixed up? I was quite confused by the call and the question - more disoriented - because I knew he had just gone out for dinner with his friend, who was married. What could have happened from then to now that caused him to want to set me up with someone.... I said, what are you talking about? With who? He said, I don't know his name but he's supposed to be a really nice man and a doctor. I said, is his name Barry? He didn't even know his name and I knew immediately, oh my goodness it's Barry! After several days, we discovered that it was the same Barry and I thought, the universe MUST be telling me something. I simply wasn't listening.
Although I thought he wasn't interested, it seemed that the universe, something or someone (many of them) wanted us to go out on a date. I thus went into Facebook, looked him up and sent him a message. I briefly told him how many people approached me over the past year about setting us up for a date and asked if he would be interested in going out for supper. I also told him, knowing or thinking that he wasn't interested, to feel completely comfortable in telling me if he`s uninterested as I understood that we all have our preferences and I may not be his. This was my way of telling him the "banana story" I had once heard on the oprah show.
The banana story is about some people liking bananas while others don't but there's nothing wrong with the banana! If I was a banana and he didn't like them, then I knew there was nothing wrong with me but it was ok for him to tell me that he preferred strawberries : )
He responded that he would love to go out for dinner. In mid-September 2008 we met at a restaurant, I wore flat shoes intentionally, and we had an incredible time. It was first time I felt interested in going with someone a second time because he intrigued me. I could tell already that he was intelligent, worldly, fun, active and really, really nice and sweet.
Five years later, we're married and have just celebrated our daughter's 3 year birthday!! It turns HE IS ALL THE TRAITS ONE WHICH I WOULDN'T COMPROMISE and NONE OF THE ONES ON WHICH I WOULD!
I think it's important to make the "compromise" and "non-compromise" list. To me it equates to the 3rd of law of physics again - for every positive you have to have a negative. You will not get everything you want and HE WILL NOT BE PERFECT BUT HE MUST BE PERFECT FOR YOU!
Before the oddity - on August 23, 2008 I remember feeling incredibly grateful as I was writing in my journal but had connected my passion for finding the man I wanted with what I was describing over time. I remember writing the following in my journal with a huge smile on my face, sparkle in my eye and passion in my veins (for the first time)
"I want to meet a man who is kind, sweet, loving, caring, passionate, concerned, sensitive to my needs, worldy, intelligent, financially stable, tall, dark hair, physically fit or partially active, humble, enjoys staying home more than going out, runs or jogs, is honest, learns from mistakes, understanding, wise, spiritual, warm, affectionate, loves me for who I am."
Yes I know this is quite a big list, but at the same time it was an honest one, where I was able to identify traits on which I wouldn't compromise and ones where I would. The person with whom I wanted to share my life HAD to be kind, sweet, loving, caring, passionate, concerned (which meant compassionate), sensitive to my needs, intelligent, financially stable, somewhat active, humble, honest, learns from mistakes, understanding, wise, spiritual, warm, affectionate and loves me for who I am. The traits on which I would compromise were tall, dark hair, enjoys staying at home more than going out, runs or jogs.
Now back to my 8th set up:
In the beginning of September my friend went out to a restaurant to celebrate a birthday with a close friend. When they were being seated by the hostess they happened to start a conversation about whether she was single. She informed them that she had recently been set up with someone whom she was dating but continued to say she was to be originally set up with another man. She heard so many good things about this man, a doctor, that she asked my friend if he knew a nice single with whom she can fix him up. My friend immediately called me from the restaurant and said, do you want to be fixed up? I was quite confused by the call and the question - more disoriented - because I knew he had just gone out for dinner with his friend, who was married. What could have happened from then to now that caused him to want to set me up with someone.... I said, what are you talking about? With who? He said, I don't know his name but he's supposed to be a really nice man and a doctor. I said, is his name Barry? He didn't even know his name and I knew immediately, oh my goodness it's Barry! After several days, we discovered that it was the same Barry and I thought, the universe MUST be telling me something. I simply wasn't listening.
Although I thought he wasn't interested, it seemed that the universe, something or someone (many of them) wanted us to go out on a date. I thus went into Facebook, looked him up and sent him a message. I briefly told him how many people approached me over the past year about setting us up for a date and asked if he would be interested in going out for supper. I also told him, knowing or thinking that he wasn't interested, to feel completely comfortable in telling me if he`s uninterested as I understood that we all have our preferences and I may not be his. This was my way of telling him the "banana story" I had once heard on the oprah show.
The banana story is about some people liking bananas while others don't but there's nothing wrong with the banana! If I was a banana and he didn't like them, then I knew there was nothing wrong with me but it was ok for him to tell me that he preferred strawberries : )
He responded that he would love to go out for dinner. In mid-September 2008 we met at a restaurant, I wore flat shoes intentionally, and we had an incredible time. It was first time I felt interested in going with someone a second time because he intrigued me. I could tell already that he was intelligent, worldly, fun, active and really, really nice and sweet.
Five years later, we're married and have just celebrated our daughter's 3 year birthday!! It turns HE IS ALL THE TRAITS ONE WHICH I WOULDN'T COMPROMISE and NONE OF THE ONES ON WHICH I WOULD!
I think it's important to make the "compromise" and "non-compromise" list. To me it equates to the 3rd of law of physics again - for every positive you have to have a negative. You will not get everything you want and HE WILL NOT BE PERFECT BUT HE MUST BE PERFECT FOR YOU!
Tuesday, May 21, 2013
Programmation to get what you want in life - Part 3 - the Vision Board
I was now a firm believer that I was able to get what I wanted in life by: 1) determining what I wanted, 2) writing it down, and 3) believing that it would happen. It had worked like magic with my husband. He was everything I had "ordered" :) It was also working for my great friend Kathy, who is detailing her experiences in our blog as well. Now I was excited to see what other things I could order and get!
I was pushing 40, was newly married, and we both wanted a child/children. For some unknown reason though, I was nervous to create a new list of programmation for a baby and kept stalling. At that time, Kathy wanted to go with me to a locally advertised evening where all present would be creating a dream/vision board. This involved an evening of searching through magazines and finding pictures and quotations of items you want to attract into your life that you paste onto a cardboard surface. You then put this vision board in a place where you can see it each day as a reminder to keep focusing on your goals and dreams. During that evening, I found this adorable picture of a dark haired baby boy. I had to put him on my vision board. He looked a lot like my husband. That evening was what I needed to get me motivated to focus my energy on a baby - what we were wanting.
From that evening on, I was re-energized. I created a list of programmation for our baby and found myself spending more and more time trying to make our baby a reality. I joined "baby clubs" online (www.babycenter.ca), calculated, using my monthly cycle, when I could get pregnant, and daily read articles online on this topic. I was so focused. Within a short time, I was pregnant! I had never been pregnant before, yet here I was! I gave birth to a beautiful, healthy baby boy who is now four years old and as wonderful as ever.
My husband and I both wanted more children, yet neither of us could get motivated the way we were with our baby. I tried creating a new vision board and more than once a list of programmation, but my heart just wasn't in it - and it never came about. It's like it wasn't meant to be. I really believe in my case that the desire and feeling of expectation helped make our baby a reality for us.
I was pushing 40, was newly married, and we both wanted a child/children. For some unknown reason though, I was nervous to create a new list of programmation for a baby and kept stalling. At that time, Kathy wanted to go with me to a locally advertised evening where all present would be creating a dream/vision board. This involved an evening of searching through magazines and finding pictures and quotations of items you want to attract into your life that you paste onto a cardboard surface. You then put this vision board in a place where you can see it each day as a reminder to keep focusing on your goals and dreams. During that evening, I found this adorable picture of a dark haired baby boy. I had to put him on my vision board. He looked a lot like my husband. That evening was what I needed to get me motivated to focus my energy on a baby - what we were wanting.
From that evening on, I was re-energized. I created a list of programmation for our baby and found myself spending more and more time trying to make our baby a reality. I joined "baby clubs" online (www.babycenter.ca), calculated, using my monthly cycle, when I could get pregnant, and daily read articles online on this topic. I was so focused. Within a short time, I was pregnant! I had never been pregnant before, yet here I was! I gave birth to a beautiful, healthy baby boy who is now four years old and as wonderful as ever.
My husband and I both wanted more children, yet neither of us could get motivated the way we were with our baby. I tried creating a new vision board and more than once a list of programmation, but my heart just wasn't in it - and it never came about. It's like it wasn't meant to be. I really believe in my case that the desire and feeling of expectation helped make our baby a reality for us.
Monday, May 13, 2013
The law of attraction is simple physics....
In reading Susan's blog, I realized how similar my story was in meeting my husband and her blog inspired me to write about it. At that time I didn't title it programmation or thought of it as programming. I simply thought of it as Newton's third law of motion - to every action there's an equal and opposite reaction.
The action = Put your energy and passion towards what you want while articulating it clearly in writing. Do this often - everyday, several times a week or a couple of times of a week but somehow make time to prioritize it.
The reaction = The universe will find a way to bring it to you.
Several years ago, I was divorced, a work-a-holic (90 hours per week) and a runner. I wasn't dating a lot because I wan't making time for it and when I did go out on a date, it simply wasn't a match. During the second year of my newly divorced life I decided to start a gratitude journal (my first entry was on Feb 24, 2008) to take me out of my work-a-holic cloud and bring me back to reality a bit. All I did was write the things for which I was grateful that day some of which were my health, being alive, my family, the smiles and laughter I share with my niece and nephew and "to be given the experiences I encounter in my job and being exposed to cultures in many different countries."
On Feb 26, 2008 I modified my journal to include "I want..." after I documented "I am grateful for..." I figured it was important to focus on gratitude as well as articulating my wants in life. Here is what I wrote:
"I want to have a positive influence on all people with whom I come into contact."
" I want to marry a man w"
I wasn't able to finish the sentence when it came to the man I wanted to marry because I didn't yet know how to articulate what I looking for. How could I even meet the man I wanted to meet if I couldn't even define him in words?
Feb 28, 2008 I was "grateful for having a great evening with Susan (This is the Susan with whom I write this blog) and for attracting such a nice girl into my life." That day I started my journey to articuating the man for whom I was looking and wrote " I want to meet, fall in love with and marry a man who is intelligent, honest, trustworthy, has integrity, credibility, to whom I am wildly attracted, who is supportive, is in love with me, who is wild about me, brings out the best in me and in whom I bring out the best." I vividly remember writing these words and not feeling connected to them. I wasn't yet emotionally assocating the words with the wants but it was a step closer to meeting him. I know knew how to define him but it felt a little robotic.
As I was journaling, people had been trying to set me up with this person named Barry. Barry and I knew each other for nearly 15 years but we had not dated. About one year before I met my former husband, a friend wanted to set me up with Barry but he thought I was too tall for him (we're actually the same height but I used to wear high heels which made me tower over him). I let it go and she then set me up with the man who became my former husband.
Back to my second year of being divorced. When people would ask to set me up with Barry, I would simply tell them to forget it because he thought I was too tall. Over the year this happened 8 times! Some were friends, some were people I met at the salon while getting my nails done but it happened quite often. The last one was the strangest and the catalyst to meeting the man I would later marry.
I'll continue this story next time ....now I have to go purchase some things for our soon to be 3 year old's birthday party.....: )
The action = Put your energy and passion towards what you want while articulating it clearly in writing. Do this often - everyday, several times a week or a couple of times of a week but somehow make time to prioritize it.
The reaction = The universe will find a way to bring it to you.
Several years ago, I was divorced, a work-a-holic (90 hours per week) and a runner. I wasn't dating a lot because I wan't making time for it and when I did go out on a date, it simply wasn't a match. During the second year of my newly divorced life I decided to start a gratitude journal (my first entry was on Feb 24, 2008) to take me out of my work-a-holic cloud and bring me back to reality a bit. All I did was write the things for which I was grateful that day some of which were my health, being alive, my family, the smiles and laughter I share with my niece and nephew and "to be given the experiences I encounter in my job and being exposed to cultures in many different countries."
On Feb 26, 2008 I modified my journal to include "I want..." after I documented "I am grateful for..." I figured it was important to focus on gratitude as well as articulating my wants in life. Here is what I wrote:
"I want to have a positive influence on all people with whom I come into contact."
" I want to marry a man w"
I wasn't able to finish the sentence when it came to the man I wanted to marry because I didn't yet know how to articulate what I looking for. How could I even meet the man I wanted to meet if I couldn't even define him in words?
Feb 28, 2008 I was "grateful for having a great evening with Susan (This is the Susan with whom I write this blog) and for attracting such a nice girl into my life." That day I started my journey to articuating the man for whom I was looking and wrote " I want to meet, fall in love with and marry a man who is intelligent, honest, trustworthy, has integrity, credibility, to whom I am wildly attracted, who is supportive, is in love with me, who is wild about me, brings out the best in me and in whom I bring out the best." I vividly remember writing these words and not feeling connected to them. I wasn't yet emotionally assocating the words with the wants but it was a step closer to meeting him. I know knew how to define him but it felt a little robotic.
As I was journaling, people had been trying to set me up with this person named Barry. Barry and I knew each other for nearly 15 years but we had not dated. About one year before I met my former husband, a friend wanted to set me up with Barry but he thought I was too tall for him (we're actually the same height but I used to wear high heels which made me tower over him). I let it go and she then set me up with the man who became my former husband.
Back to my second year of being divorced. When people would ask to set me up with Barry, I would simply tell them to forget it because he thought I was too tall. Over the year this happened 8 times! Some were friends, some were people I met at the salon while getting my nails done but it happened quite often. The last one was the strangest and the catalyst to meeting the man I would later marry.
I'll continue this story next time ....now I have to go purchase some things for our soon to be 3 year old's birthday party.....: )
Monday, May 6, 2013
Programmation to get what you want in life - Part 2
I was newly dating a cute, short, brown haired guy, yet I had "ordered" a tall, dark haired guy. I knew that he was not the man I had described in detail on my programmation list. I thought at first that I could just play along and see where life took us, but that was the way I had always done things. This time I wanted things to be different. This time I wanted things to work out for us.
I had been invited to attend a gathering of co-workers for drinks before the Christmas holidays, and I invited my short, brown haired guy. Fortuitously, he couldn't make it. Oh well I thought. I still wanted to go. When I first arrived, my eyes focused on this amazing looking, dark haired guy. He was sitting nearby, surrounded by friends/co-workers. Our eyes met each other over and over again, yet the evening progressed with nothing more than a quick smile.
Some of my co-workers wanted to grab a bite with me elsewhere. I looked at him and thought to myself that I guess he's not "the one". I was gathering my belongings and heading to the door when suddenly he was in front of me! It was crazy. How did he get there so fast I thought. He told me that he had wanted to meet me all night, but saw that I was surrounded by friends and looked busy. He said that he'd noticed I was leaving, but wanted to know if I would call him if he gave me his phone number. I looked up at this tall, dark, beautiful man and blurted out "yes!" I was so happy and couldn't stop thinking of him all night, and haven't stopped now 10 years later! Mark truly was everything I had ordered, everything I had written on my list.
It's amazing that the two of us were both there, single that night. I found out from Mark later, that some of his co-workers had been trying to set him up with someone, and they were preparing to go on a date. He also told me that he had nearly driven home and missed this evening, but at the last minute changed his mind, and decided to go after all. As mentioned earlier, I had invited the short, brown haired guy to attend with me. As fate would have it, he couldn't. Further, I had a male friend in the US who was going through some difficulties whom I had invited to stay at my place. Had he been in town, I would not have been there, and Mark later told me that there was no way he would have approached me if I was with another guy.
My mind can go in circles trying to determine just how much fate intervened that evening. Did we meet by chance or were we programmed to be there that night? No one can answer that, but I do know that making my list made what I wanted in a partner crystal clear to me, and when we met, I knew he was the one for me. There is a saying that when the student is ready, the teacher will appear, but it could aptly apply here: when I was ready, my partner would appear. All I had to do was make my list and believe that I would get what I had ordered. And I did! There is so much more to say on this topic that I decided to make this part of a trilogy. My next blog will discuss how I got the other most important person in my life.
I had been invited to attend a gathering of co-workers for drinks before the Christmas holidays, and I invited my short, brown haired guy. Fortuitously, he couldn't make it. Oh well I thought. I still wanted to go. When I first arrived, my eyes focused on this amazing looking, dark haired guy. He was sitting nearby, surrounded by friends/co-workers. Our eyes met each other over and over again, yet the evening progressed with nothing more than a quick smile.
Some of my co-workers wanted to grab a bite with me elsewhere. I looked at him and thought to myself that I guess he's not "the one". I was gathering my belongings and heading to the door when suddenly he was in front of me! It was crazy. How did he get there so fast I thought. He told me that he had wanted to meet me all night, but saw that I was surrounded by friends and looked busy. He said that he'd noticed I was leaving, but wanted to know if I would call him if he gave me his phone number. I looked up at this tall, dark, beautiful man and blurted out "yes!" I was so happy and couldn't stop thinking of him all night, and haven't stopped now 10 years later! Mark truly was everything I had ordered, everything I had written on my list.
It's amazing that the two of us were both there, single that night. I found out from Mark later, that some of his co-workers had been trying to set him up with someone, and they were preparing to go on a date. He also told me that he had nearly driven home and missed this evening, but at the last minute changed his mind, and decided to go after all. As mentioned earlier, I had invited the short, brown haired guy to attend with me. As fate would have it, he couldn't. Further, I had a male friend in the US who was going through some difficulties whom I had invited to stay at my place. Had he been in town, I would not have been there, and Mark later told me that there was no way he would have approached me if I was with another guy.
My mind can go in circles trying to determine just how much fate intervened that evening. Did we meet by chance or were we programmed to be there that night? No one can answer that, but I do know that making my list made what I wanted in a partner crystal clear to me, and when we met, I knew he was the one for me. There is a saying that when the student is ready, the teacher will appear, but it could aptly apply here: when I was ready, my partner would appear. All I had to do was make my list and believe that I would get what I had ordered. And I did! There is so much more to say on this topic that I decided to make this part of a trilogy. My next blog will discuss how I got the other most important person in my life.
Finding your passion means trying new things
When my daughter started school in September 2012 I was told I had to ensure everything she had was labelled. We had to label her water bottle, her snack bag, her clothing, her shoes, her hat, her shoe box and every toy she brings with her so as to ensure no mix-ups occur. To be honest, I had no idea where to buy labels so I started asking around. The only information I received was one online company that "everyone uses" and one store near my neighborhood. I felt that this wasn't sufficient information so I decided to do some research to see what other options were available. I wasn't only looking to label my daughter's clothes, I was looking for a quality, long lasting , easy to use product (not an iron-on), reasonably priced, with choices of designs that appealed to me and some other added benefits.
I ended up finding this fantastic online company which not only met the above criteria but provided two very interesting and important benefits not offered by other companies.
- The first was the unique and exclusive "found-it" tracking system, completely free of charge, allowing your lost item to be returned to you using an online coding system so you remain anonymous.
- The second was the comapny offered its agents the ability to fundraise for a charity of their choice by returning 20% of the sale to the charity.
I bought the labels to try them and have been more than satisfied with the company and the product! I love them! They're easy to use, stay on everything on which I've put them, they're adorable, I love the colors, designs and my daughter loves them.
Recently, I was organizing my daughter's 3rd birthday party and decided this would be a great personalized gift to include in the kids' loot bags so I ordered a package for each child, hoping to introduce the other moms to this amazing product. In doing so, I asked the company how I could use this opportunity to get a discount and advertise for them. They informed me that I could become an agent, which I did.
If you're interested in ordering from this company, supporting me in my new venture and a charity please go to: www.oliverslabels.com/kathylempert
I set up a foundation with the Montreal Children's Hospital for my daughter's birthday. I can tell you one thing, this feels good! The fact that I can earn money while giving back to charity by selling a product that I love is amazing. Stay tuned for more "new things..."
I ended up finding this fantastic online company which not only met the above criteria but provided two very interesting and important benefits not offered by other companies.
- The first was the unique and exclusive "found-it" tracking system, completely free of charge, allowing your lost item to be returned to you using an online coding system so you remain anonymous.
- The second was the comapny offered its agents the ability to fundraise for a charity of their choice by returning 20% of the sale to the charity.
I bought the labels to try them and have been more than satisfied with the company and the product! I love them! They're easy to use, stay on everything on which I've put them, they're adorable, I love the colors, designs and my daughter loves them.
Recently, I was organizing my daughter's 3rd birthday party and decided this would be a great personalized gift to include in the kids' loot bags so I ordered a package for each child, hoping to introduce the other moms to this amazing product. In doing so, I asked the company how I could use this opportunity to get a discount and advertise for them. They informed me that I could become an agent, which I did.
If you're interested in ordering from this company, supporting me in my new venture and a charity please go to: www.oliverslabels.com/kathylempert
I set up a foundation with the Montreal Children's Hospital for my daughter's birthday. I can tell you one thing, this feels good! The fact that I can earn money while giving back to charity by selling a product that I love is amazing. Stay tuned for more "new things..."
Thursday, May 2, 2013
The Attitude of Gratitude Works!
I had forgotten what it was like to have an attitude of gratitude as I had been caught up in my own tirals and tribulations over the last couple of years. However, a little while ago, I decided to revert back to having an attitude of gratitude and began my days being grateful for....whatever it is in my life that I have.
Yesterday was a beautiful day. I had to run several errands and follow up with exercise, to which I have also recently gone back. I walked into the local Staples store to get some large size documents scanned onto a stick. The cashier helping me informed me that it would cost $10 to which I replied, ok, what choice do I have, I must have these documents scanned.
We started discussing what a beautiful day it was and I mentioned how lucky we are to experience winter as it makes us grateful to have these beautiful days. When he finished scanning my documents, we both walked toward the cash and he whispered, I'm going to give you a discount. I couldn`t believe it! I thought, what a nice man, wanting to give me a discount for absolutely no reason. I didn`t ask for one so why would he have even offered. He then charged me $5.99!!! That was a huge discount, I thought. Then, the attitude of gratitude will bring you abundance, came to mind. I saved $4 simply because I was emitting an energy of gratitude and shared it with him. It was truly a wonderful experience.
When I finished my errands, which required me to deal with the permit office at the local borough (also a wonderful experience I must add), I began my exercise regime of speed walking outside. As I was doing my walk, a woman stopped her car, pulled over mext to me simply to tell me that she loved my hair color! Can you imagine.... I absolutely had to blog about this experience because it is the universe telling me that I`m on the right path - my attitude must be of gratitude.
Today I am grateful for having connected with a high school friend, to whom I haven`t spoken in 25 years. She helped to lift an unbelievably heavy weight off my shoulders and guided me along a path that will help me achieve something on which I have been working for over 2 years. Thank you Dara, I am so grateful for your help and I know this will work!
Remember, attitude of gratitude....try it and you`ll see that it works. Stay tuned for more interesting experiences of being grateful.
Yesterday was a beautiful day. I had to run several errands and follow up with exercise, to which I have also recently gone back. I walked into the local Staples store to get some large size documents scanned onto a stick. The cashier helping me informed me that it would cost $10 to which I replied, ok, what choice do I have, I must have these documents scanned.
We started discussing what a beautiful day it was and I mentioned how lucky we are to experience winter as it makes us grateful to have these beautiful days. When he finished scanning my documents, we both walked toward the cash and he whispered, I'm going to give you a discount. I couldn`t believe it! I thought, what a nice man, wanting to give me a discount for absolutely no reason. I didn`t ask for one so why would he have even offered. He then charged me $5.99!!! That was a huge discount, I thought. Then, the attitude of gratitude will bring you abundance, came to mind. I saved $4 simply because I was emitting an energy of gratitude and shared it with him. It was truly a wonderful experience.
When I finished my errands, which required me to deal with the permit office at the local borough (also a wonderful experience I must add), I began my exercise regime of speed walking outside. As I was doing my walk, a woman stopped her car, pulled over mext to me simply to tell me that she loved my hair color! Can you imagine.... I absolutely had to blog about this experience because it is the universe telling me that I`m on the right path - my attitude must be of gratitude.
Today I am grateful for having connected with a high school friend, to whom I haven`t spoken in 25 years. She helped to lift an unbelievably heavy weight off my shoulders and guided me along a path that will help me achieve something on which I have been working for over 2 years. Thank you Dara, I am so grateful for your help and I know this will work!
Remember, attitude of gratitude....try it and you`ll see that it works. Stay tuned for more interesting experiences of being grateful.
Sunday, April 28, 2013
Programmation to get what you want in life
Some years back, I befriended an interesting colleague at my place of work. In one of our lunchtime conversations, she told me how to get exactly what I wanted in life. I had recently broken up with a boyfriend who was not good for me, and was looking for "Mr. Right". I definitely did not want to make the same mistakes I had made before when it came to choosing my partner. I wanted this time to be different, so I was fascinated with what she had to say.
My friend told me that I needed to program myself to find "him". But how? She told me to write down specifically what I was wanting in a partner. She said to put the list beside my bed and read it before going to sleep each night, and again each morning as I awoke. She said to do this until I found who I was wanting. This idea was entirely new to me, but it sounded logical. It wasn't like she was telling me to do 25 jumping jacks in my underclothes, or stand on my head outside my apartment yelling at each passerby.
I decided to do what she said that very night. Writing the list forced me to really think about who I wanted to be with, what specific characteristics I wanted. It was so much fun. It was like buying a new car or house. We put so much thought into what we want when we buy cars or houses, yet when it comes to finding a life partner, we seem to leave it all to chance with little to no thought ahead of time as to what we want and whether he or she would be good for us, or we for them.
I made my list. I wrote down things like good sense of humor, tall (because I'm tall), dark haired, pleasing to the eye (I didn't want to get too greedy), good with money, understanding of my health (as I had some serious health problems), wanting children, kind, considerate, good with his family and a few other items that were important to me. It was like I was placing an order.
My list really cemented in my mind, and clarified what characteristics were important to me, plus I had this huge expectation that I was going to find him. I was so invigorated! Each time I met a cute, tall, dark haired man, I wondered to myself if he was the one. Within a matter of days, I met a cute, short, medium brown haired guy who asked me out on a date. As you can see, he wasn't quite what I had "ordered", but I was willing to bend the rules and give him a try. He was sweet and kind and truly there was nothing to complain about with him, yet he was not the man I had "programmed" myself to meet. He wasn't the one and I knew it.
What happened to the cute, short, medium brown haired guy? Did I stay with him despite the fact that he wasn't whom I'd ordered? Did things work out after all? Stay tuned. The answer to this, and how I've continued to use programmation to get what I want in life, will be in my next blog!
My friend told me that I needed to program myself to find "him". But how? She told me to write down specifically what I was wanting in a partner. She said to put the list beside my bed and read it before going to sleep each night, and again each morning as I awoke. She said to do this until I found who I was wanting. This idea was entirely new to me, but it sounded logical. It wasn't like she was telling me to do 25 jumping jacks in my underclothes, or stand on my head outside my apartment yelling at each passerby.
I decided to do what she said that very night. Writing the list forced me to really think about who I wanted to be with, what specific characteristics I wanted. It was so much fun. It was like buying a new car or house. We put so much thought into what we want when we buy cars or houses, yet when it comes to finding a life partner, we seem to leave it all to chance with little to no thought ahead of time as to what we want and whether he or she would be good for us, or we for them.
I made my list. I wrote down things like good sense of humor, tall (because I'm tall), dark haired, pleasing to the eye (I didn't want to get too greedy), good with money, understanding of my health (as I had some serious health problems), wanting children, kind, considerate, good with his family and a few other items that were important to me. It was like I was placing an order.
My list really cemented in my mind, and clarified what characteristics were important to me, plus I had this huge expectation that I was going to find him. I was so invigorated! Each time I met a cute, tall, dark haired man, I wondered to myself if he was the one. Within a matter of days, I met a cute, short, medium brown haired guy who asked me out on a date. As you can see, he wasn't quite what I had "ordered", but I was willing to bend the rules and give him a try. He was sweet and kind and truly there was nothing to complain about with him, yet he was not the man I had "programmed" myself to meet. He wasn't the one and I knew it.
What happened to the cute, short, medium brown haired guy? Did I stay with him despite the fact that he wasn't whom I'd ordered? Did things work out after all? Stay tuned. The answer to this, and how I've continued to use programmation to get what I want in life, will be in my next blog!
Wednesday, April 24, 2013
Passion and Joy through the eyes of a child
First I'll start off this blog being grateful so that I can conciously remind myself to appreciate the wonderful things I have in my life.
- I am grateful for my health and being alive.
- I am grateful for having observed and am proud of my almost 3 year old daughter who was being pulled by the hood of her jacket today, by another little girl and instead of reacting physcially (by pushing her away) she stood firmly, looked at the girl in the face, raised her hand up to indicate "STOP" and stated firmly and assertively, PLEASE STOP! The girl then let go immediately. It was such a proud moment because it showed a lot about her decision making ability. She controlled a natural reaction of pushing the child away and chose instead to use strength in her body language, words and tone to achieve the same solution.
- I am grateful for the wonderful weekend I had with my family and friends.
- I am grateful for my husband and how he enjoys helping me through challenging times.
I have been on the search for my passion for a few years now and haven't really been able to find IT. I have not tried to put concious focus on it hoping that it would come naturally. Unfortunately, I have kept myself so busy which clouded my mind resulting in not having the clarity it needed to find this passion within me. I do however observe moments of passion experienced by others.
- When I look outside across the street, in the spring, summer and fall months, I see several children outside everyday, after school to playing street hockey. Sometimes one plays alone, just to practice because he loves it so much.
- My husband, a physician and surgeon, has a passion for skiing and would do it on a daily basis if he could. In fact, this weekend he told me that if someone told him he had to run a ski hill he would love it!
- I have friends who love art and spend everyday painting, reading about art, looking at art, studying art, whatever it is that is art related they will do.
The common theme in the above examples is loving something so much, having so much passion for something that you would put everything aside and WANT to do it everyday. Several months ago I asked myself the question, "if I could do something everyday, what would it be?" My mind was a blank! Wow, what a revelation! I don't LOVE to do one THING everyday. I like doing things but I couldn't say I wish I could THIS everyday. I felt empty. How is it that other people have this joy, this love, this passion to fulfill this inner need and I don't? How do you find IT? Maybe I don't have IT? Impossible, I thought. I know I have IT but i've lost it along the way.
I had to remove all the events, circumstances and experiences that made me this responsible, risk mitigating, less exciting, accountable adult and go back to when I was a child. This was a very challenging thing to do because I had been this person for so long, now 44 years old. It was quite tough to remember what it was like to be that "carefree" little girl.
As a young child, I remember loving nature, animals and observing people (people watching). I remember watching Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom with my parents and being completely caught up in the adventure I was watching. This is where my journey begins. I must peel off layers, open my mind's doors, windows and break the walls leading to my soul and become, on the outside who I am completely on the inside.
- I am grateful for my health and being alive.
- I am grateful for having observed and am proud of my almost 3 year old daughter who was being pulled by the hood of her jacket today, by another little girl and instead of reacting physcially (by pushing her away) she stood firmly, looked at the girl in the face, raised her hand up to indicate "STOP" and stated firmly and assertively, PLEASE STOP! The girl then let go immediately. It was such a proud moment because it showed a lot about her decision making ability. She controlled a natural reaction of pushing the child away and chose instead to use strength in her body language, words and tone to achieve the same solution.
- I am grateful for the wonderful weekend I had with my family and friends.
- I am grateful for my husband and how he enjoys helping me through challenging times.
I have been on the search for my passion for a few years now and haven't really been able to find IT. I have not tried to put concious focus on it hoping that it would come naturally. Unfortunately, I have kept myself so busy which clouded my mind resulting in not having the clarity it needed to find this passion within me. I do however observe moments of passion experienced by others.
- When I look outside across the street, in the spring, summer and fall months, I see several children outside everyday, after school to playing street hockey. Sometimes one plays alone, just to practice because he loves it so much.
- My husband, a physician and surgeon, has a passion for skiing and would do it on a daily basis if he could. In fact, this weekend he told me that if someone told him he had to run a ski hill he would love it!
- I have friends who love art and spend everyday painting, reading about art, looking at art, studying art, whatever it is that is art related they will do.
The common theme in the above examples is loving something so much, having so much passion for something that you would put everything aside and WANT to do it everyday. Several months ago I asked myself the question, "if I could do something everyday, what would it be?" My mind was a blank! Wow, what a revelation! I don't LOVE to do one THING everyday. I like doing things but I couldn't say I wish I could THIS everyday. I felt empty. How is it that other people have this joy, this love, this passion to fulfill this inner need and I don't? How do you find IT? Maybe I don't have IT? Impossible, I thought. I know I have IT but i've lost it along the way.
I had to remove all the events, circumstances and experiences that made me this responsible, risk mitigating, less exciting, accountable adult and go back to when I was a child. This was a very challenging thing to do because I had been this person for so long, now 44 years old. It was quite tough to remember what it was like to be that "carefree" little girl.
As a young child, I remember loving nature, animals and observing people (people watching). I remember watching Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom with my parents and being completely caught up in the adventure I was watching. This is where my journey begins. I must peel off layers, open my mind's doors, windows and break the walls leading to my soul and become, on the outside who I am completely on the inside.
Friday, April 19, 2013
Attracting What You Want
I can't stop thinking about that incident that happened to you some years ago, Kathy. I know that you'd be much better able to retell it than me, but it was such a great story, I just have to have a go at it because it's such an important lesson and universal law.
What happened involved the concept of wanting something so much, putting the idea of getting it "out there", and then receiving it from another, without saying a word. You may have had something similar happen to you or happen to someone you know, and when it does, it fills you with such a rush of amazement and excitement because you realize how powerful thoughts and intentions can be.
Kathy had told me that as a young girl of about eight years old she had seen these black patent shoes in a store and fell in love with them. She couldn't afford them and told no one of her desire for them, including her parents. They were not the kind of shoes her parents normally would have bought for her. This didn't stop her, however, from wanting them, thinking about them constantly, and visualizing herself with these shoes. She did this for many weeks. You can imagine her enormous surprise when one day soon thereafter, her mother presented her with a pair of shoes for a gift - and not just any shoes - the very same pair that she had been longing for and visualizing!
It's the kind of story that gives you chills. It seems incredible. Too good to be true, yet the reality is that focusing on a specific thing is in fact giving energy to the specific thing, and the object begins to find its way to you. This idea known as the law of attraction, or perhaps more recently labelled "the secret" was made infamous by Oprah Winfrey. You may have in fact, been practicing it accidentally for years as perhaps was the case with Kathy.
I too stumbled across this law a few years before "the secret" was made famous the world over. I was excited to put it into practice, after all, I felt I had nothing to lose and everything to gain. There was a special method suggested to me by a friend that seemed almost too simple to work. I can't wait to tell you about how using it brought me the two greatest loves of my life.
What happened involved the concept of wanting something so much, putting the idea of getting it "out there", and then receiving it from another, without saying a word. You may have had something similar happen to you or happen to someone you know, and when it does, it fills you with such a rush of amazement and excitement because you realize how powerful thoughts and intentions can be.
Kathy had told me that as a young girl of about eight years old she had seen these black patent shoes in a store and fell in love with them. She couldn't afford them and told no one of her desire for them, including her parents. They were not the kind of shoes her parents normally would have bought for her. This didn't stop her, however, from wanting them, thinking about them constantly, and visualizing herself with these shoes. She did this for many weeks. You can imagine her enormous surprise when one day soon thereafter, her mother presented her with a pair of shoes for a gift - and not just any shoes - the very same pair that she had been longing for and visualizing!
It's the kind of story that gives you chills. It seems incredible. Too good to be true, yet the reality is that focusing on a specific thing is in fact giving energy to the specific thing, and the object begins to find its way to you. This idea known as the law of attraction, or perhaps more recently labelled "the secret" was made infamous by Oprah Winfrey. You may have in fact, been practicing it accidentally for years as perhaps was the case with Kathy.
I too stumbled across this law a few years before "the secret" was made famous the world over. I was excited to put it into practice, after all, I felt I had nothing to lose and everything to gain. There was a special method suggested to me by a friend that seemed almost too simple to work. I can't wait to tell you about how using it brought me the two greatest loves of my life.
Thursday, April 18, 2013
Seeing life through the eyes of a child
So today I decided to keep my four year old son home from daycare. He only goes 3 days a week and today was one of those days, but the cough and runny nose he's had for the last few days seemed exceptionally loose and runny this rainy morning, so I made the executive decision to keep him home with me. It was next to impossible to get him out of bed, but ironically, as soon a I gave him the news that he'd be staying home with me, he jumped up and down yelling "yay, yay, yay". Not quite the reaction I was expecting from my "sick" son, but the decision had been made, and despite his outbursts, it still felt like it was the right thing to do.
My husband was about to return from a business trip, so I'd planned to spend a good portion of the day doing the cleaning that I had sort of let slip while he was gone. As they say, when the cats away the mice will play, and while he was out of town, I got away from my usual routine and enjoyed myself a little more than usual (i.e. slacked off a tad).
Doing the house cleaning with my son today reminded me to appreciate these usual tiresome chores, and to cherish these moments with him. He helped me to find the joy in what usually would be a tedious and mundane experience. Changing the sheets was an opportunity to make a tent on the floor, followed by some fun moments jumping on the bed. Washing the dishes became laughing and splashing around in the sink. Even washing the floor had some enjoyable moments together. It brought back the memories I had as a child first crying over not being allowed to dry the dishes with my two older brothers, but then having my father find a way to let me participate so I could "have fun" too. I guess sometimes living life through the eyes of a child can make everything fresh, exciting and new again. I need to do it more often!
My husband was about to return from a business trip, so I'd planned to spend a good portion of the day doing the cleaning that I had sort of let slip while he was gone. As they say, when the cats away the mice will play, and while he was out of town, I got away from my usual routine and enjoyed myself a little more than usual (i.e. slacked off a tad).
Doing the house cleaning with my son today reminded me to appreciate these usual tiresome chores, and to cherish these moments with him. He helped me to find the joy in what usually would be a tedious and mundane experience. Changing the sheets was an opportunity to make a tent on the floor, followed by some fun moments jumping on the bed. Washing the dishes became laughing and splashing around in the sink. Even washing the floor had some enjoyable moments together. It brought back the memories I had as a child first crying over not being allowed to dry the dishes with my two older brothers, but then having my father find a way to let me participate so I could "have fun" too. I guess sometimes living life through the eyes of a child can make everything fresh, exciting and new again. I need to do it more often!
Being grateful will bring you abundance
Hi Susie Q - I'm going back to what I used to do a few years ago and simply allowed life to get in the way of making this the priority it should be. I'm going to share all the things for which I'm grateful today.
I'm grateful for having an amazing husband by whom I'm inspired, I admire, who makes me a better person and brings outs the best in and wants the best for me.
I'm grateful for my daughter Skylar (almost 3 years old) who was our little miracle! I had less than a 5% chance of having a baby and was blessed with a kind, warm, loving, smart, well balanced, adorbale little girl. She is the best thing that happened to us!
I am grateful to have rekindled a relationship with my sister and looking forward to the closeness we both want in our relationship.
I am grateful for my wonderful relationship with my other sister and look forward to being the three muskateers.
I'm grateful for having my father in my life who is always there when I need him.
I'm grateful for my close friends who are caring, loving, inspiring, strong, wonderful women and who also want the best for me.
I'm grateful for my health, the life I'm able to live and be present in the present!
I'm grateful for having an amazing husband by whom I'm inspired, I admire, who makes me a better person and brings outs the best in and wants the best for me.
I'm grateful for my daughter Skylar (almost 3 years old) who was our little miracle! I had less than a 5% chance of having a baby and was blessed with a kind, warm, loving, smart, well balanced, adorbale little girl. She is the best thing that happened to us!
I am grateful to have rekindled a relationship with my sister and looking forward to the closeness we both want in our relationship.
I am grateful for my wonderful relationship with my other sister and look forward to being the three muskateers.
I'm grateful for having my father in my life who is always there when I need him.
I'm grateful for my close friends who are caring, loving, inspiring, strong, wonderful women and who also want the best for me.
I'm grateful for my health, the life I'm able to live and be present in the present!
Wednesday, April 17, 2013
Staying centered: First blog ever (Newbie)
Staying centered: First blog ever (Newbie): Hi and welcome to my first blog post ever! By doing this, I feel like I'm slowly catching up with the rest of the world in social media...
Staying centered: Hello out there! I'm Kathy and quite new to the wo...
Staying centered: Hello out there! I'm Kathy and quite new to the wo...: Hello out there! I'm Kathy and quite new to the world of blogging. You may have already read my friend Susan's first b log regardin...
Hello out there! I'm Kathy and quite new to the world of blogging. You may have already read my friend Susan's first blog regarding having gone to the Oprah event, here in Montreal a few days ago. As Susan mentioned, Oprah didn't say anything we hadn't already heard or knew intuitively, but it was a real reminder of staying on your path of truth, remaining connected to your passion or what truly motivates you to be or remain joyful.
Susan and I left that evening, inspired to start a blog together. She and I are such close friends. We speak on the phone, get together for lunch or dinner and spend the entire time chatting, catching up on each other's lives, asking for advice or sometimes just venting. What's great about our friendship is our honesty, non-judgement and truly wanting what's best for the other. She is one example of the people I've chosen by whom to be surrounded in my life. These choices, however came after many hurtful experiences from choosing friends who didn't want the best for me. Although it took me a long while to become aware of this and the reason for which I was making these choices I'm truly grateful for having learned the lessons as they helped me to make better choices. Interestingly, my inner voice, my whisper, my subconcious, my instinct always told me whether the choice was right or wrong but I wasn't yet mature or wise enough to listen or have "blind faith" in those whispers.
Oprah uses an all encompassing question to help her make choices. She asks herself "what do I want?" Having been a "yes" woman for many years in her life, as am I, she learned that it is important to say no when it's something that's not aligned with what you want. It is the question that has resonated within me since hearing it from her and something am I now using. It is helping me to connect my passion with my career.
I chose to do what I do because I was good at it but didn't realize that it's something about which I'm truly not passionate. This is my journey to find my passion, become centered and stay true to who I really am......
Being able to discuss it with Susan on this blog and putting it out there forces me to focus on it which will result in it becoming my reality. Along the way, Susan will venture down her own path journalizing it along with mine. Together we will help each other and begin to discover new parts of ourselves. Here we go :)
Susan and I left that evening, inspired to start a blog together. She and I are such close friends. We speak on the phone, get together for lunch or dinner and spend the entire time chatting, catching up on each other's lives, asking for advice or sometimes just venting. What's great about our friendship is our honesty, non-judgement and truly wanting what's best for the other. She is one example of the people I've chosen by whom to be surrounded in my life. These choices, however came after many hurtful experiences from choosing friends who didn't want the best for me. Although it took me a long while to become aware of this and the reason for which I was making these choices I'm truly grateful for having learned the lessons as they helped me to make better choices. Interestingly, my inner voice, my whisper, my subconcious, my instinct always told me whether the choice was right or wrong but I wasn't yet mature or wise enough to listen or have "blind faith" in those whispers.
Oprah uses an all encompassing question to help her make choices. She asks herself "what do I want?" Having been a "yes" woman for many years in her life, as am I, she learned that it is important to say no when it's something that's not aligned with what you want. It is the question that has resonated within me since hearing it from her and something am I now using. It is helping me to connect my passion with my career.
I chose to do what I do because I was good at it but didn't realize that it's something about which I'm truly not passionate. This is my journey to find my passion, become centered and stay true to who I really am......
Being able to discuss it with Susan on this blog and putting it out there forces me to focus on it which will result in it becoming my reality. Along the way, Susan will venture down her own path journalizing it along with mine. Together we will help each other and begin to discover new parts of ourselves. Here we go :)
Monday, April 15, 2013
First blog ever (Newbie)
Hi and welcome to my first blog post ever! By doing this, I feel like I'm slowly catching up with the rest of the world in social media. I've been on Facebook for a few years now, done a few YouTube videos, and as of today, I opened a Twitter account. It was open for just a few minutes and I already have a half dozen followers!
The other night I went with my great friend Kathy to see Oprah Winfrey who was in my town of Montreal. To be honest, nothing she said was really new to me, but she reminded me why she has been so successful at inspiring people to be the best that they can be. She re-told her own personal and tragic story of sexual abuse and neglect. The difference with her is one of the reasons she continues to fascinate people the world over. Her story has the fairy tale ending. While others may have understandably been stuck, forever fixated on such an incredibly horrible ordeal, not Oprah. She truly turned the lemons life handed her into lemonade, and has never looked back!
She convinced herself, even at a very young age, that she was not going to follow in the footsteps of her parents or grandparents. Oprah as a teenager, inadvertently and fortuitously announced at a beauty pageant she was in that she wanted to be a journalist. It was not even on her radar, but the evening before she had watched Barbra Walters, a hugely popular journalist at that time, and something seemed to click. From that moment on, she was determined to be a journalist and copy Barbra Walters. Oprah managed to find employment in her chosen field, but her career really took off when she decided to no longer emulate Barbra Walters, but to simply be herself. This was her turning point and what made her the great and successful person that she is today.
Since then, her role from the tv show she had for 25 years and subsequently, has been one of inspiring others to find their passion in life, primarily in a way that serves others. When one can do that, there is no limit to the success one can have as demonstrated by Oprah. It's been said before that the ocean of abundance is available to us all. We can go there with a thimble and be content with that, or we can go there with an empty truckload, replenishing it at every opportunity. The choice is ours. Our life is ours to make and success is there for us waiting if we want it to be.
The other night I went with my great friend Kathy to see Oprah Winfrey who was in my town of Montreal. To be honest, nothing she said was really new to me, but she reminded me why she has been so successful at inspiring people to be the best that they can be. She re-told her own personal and tragic story of sexual abuse and neglect. The difference with her is one of the reasons she continues to fascinate people the world over. Her story has the fairy tale ending. While others may have understandably been stuck, forever fixated on such an incredibly horrible ordeal, not Oprah. She truly turned the lemons life handed her into lemonade, and has never looked back!
She convinced herself, even at a very young age, that she was not going to follow in the footsteps of her parents or grandparents. Oprah as a teenager, inadvertently and fortuitously announced at a beauty pageant she was in that she wanted to be a journalist. It was not even on her radar, but the evening before she had watched Barbra Walters, a hugely popular journalist at that time, and something seemed to click. From that moment on, she was determined to be a journalist and copy Barbra Walters. Oprah managed to find employment in her chosen field, but her career really took off when she decided to no longer emulate Barbra Walters, but to simply be herself. This was her turning point and what made her the great and successful person that she is today.
Since then, her role from the tv show she had for 25 years and subsequently, has been one of inspiring others to find their passion in life, primarily in a way that serves others. When one can do that, there is no limit to the success one can have as demonstrated by Oprah. It's been said before that the ocean of abundance is available to us all. We can go there with a thimble and be content with that, or we can go there with an empty truckload, replenishing it at every opportunity. The choice is ours. Our life is ours to make and success is there for us waiting if we want it to be.
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